My relationship with caffeine
My body does NOT do “casual stimulation”
Some people can have three espressos before 10 a.m. and go about their day like nothing happened.
I, on the other hand, have two sips of matcha and suddenly:
My heart is auditioning for a drumline
My anxiety is doing backflips
I’m sweating behind my knees (???)
My brain is overthinking the meaning of life
I’m texting my boyfriend asking if I'm dying
At some point, I had to admit it: Caffeine wasn’t energizing me… it was destabilizing me.
My cortisol said “no thanks, actually”
This is the not-so-cute part.
Caffeine spikes cortisol.
Cortisol spikes inflammation.
Inflammation spikes acne.
Acne spikes insecurity.
Insecurity spikes stress.
And suddenly, it’s a chain reaction where my iced coffee is basically causing a mental health earthquake.
I would drink one latte and feel:
wired AND tired
weirdly lightheaded
shaky
ravenous
irritable
puffy
unable to sleep
Not exactly “that girl” energy.
My skin was the FIRST one to snitch
The funniest part? Before I even figured out the physiology, my skin was like:
“Babes… whatever you're drinking? Please stop.”
I’d have caffeine and the next day:
More congestion
Tiny bumps
A weird redness across my cheeks
Jawline breakouts
Texture that wasn’t there the day before
My body may lie. My mind may lie. But my skin? She tells the truth immediately.
I realized I was chasing the ritual, not the caffeine
This was my ah-ha moment.
I didn’t actually want the caffeine. I wanted:
the warm cup
the morning routine
the cozy vibe
the aesthetic
the treat-yourself moment
And once I separated the vibe from the chemical? Everything clicked. I didn’t need caffeine. I needed ritual.
Once I filled that gap, the dependency disappeared.
So here’s how I stay alive, awake, and functioning… without it
A. Water + minerals FIRST, not caffeine
Coconut water in the morning = instant life force. Caffeine actually depletes minerals, so replacing them is… important.
B. I eat breakfast before anything stimulating
Blood sugar stability is the real “girl boss” here.
C. Matcha is my emergency-only drink
And even then, it’s like one-third a normal serving.
D. Sunlight within 20 minutes of waking up
With SPF 30+, of course.
E. Movement - even 10 minutes
A walk or stretch. It wakes me up without frying my nervous system.
F. I stopped glamorizing exhaustion
You don’t need caffeine when you’re actually… rested.
My philosophy now: caffeine is a guest, not a roommate
I don’t demonize caffeine.
I just respect it.
And that respect looks like:
No caffeine on an empty stomach
No caffeine if I’m anxious
No caffeine after 2 pm
No caffeine during my period
No caffeine during flare-ups
No caffeine if my sleep was trash
Final takeaway? Listen to your body before you listen to your cravings.
I cut caffeine because my body told me it wasn’t working.
And the moment I stopped forcing myself to be a “coffee girl” just because everyone else was? My nervous system, my skin, my sleep, and my sanity all got infinitely better.
So if you’re reading this thinking, “wait… this is literally me”? Maybe your body is telling you the same thing mine was.